Directions - the Differences Between Men and Women

With two careers, both in male dominated professions and being the only girl in the family, my life is probably a little different than the average gal.  But it has had it's advantages, I've learned some things I might not otherwise have, or at least not as young as I did -

I know at least a half dozen phrases that rhyme with Nantucket
I know the difference between wings, hot wings, buffalo wings, boneless wings, delta wings and variable geometry wings
I know that driving really really fast on a flat tire will not generate enough centrifugal force to make it round again. 
I know how to "suck it up. . ."  and tackle a hard assignment without drama, tears or pity.
I know that of ink, Skydrol500B, hot sauce and blood, which is easier to wash out of your shirt.
I know how to grill a really, really good burger (more on that tomorrow night)

I love my gal friends, who have taught me more about faith and firearms, self sufficiency and sacrifices than any one I know, but I am truly blessed by the men I know on and off the job.

But being pretty much the lone female in that group, I'm often queried when one of them doesn't understand something his wife, daughter, sister or girlfriend did, said or bought, as if someone who has a large ninja knife on her bedroom nightstand should give advice on women.

I do give a little advice,  on minor things, such as -

Gifts to  avoid for wives (or female friends and relatives)

Shovels
NASCAR Memorabilia (unless she counts among her fantasies - winning a big race or climbing Tony Stewart)
Hair remover
Jewelry or personal item previously given an ex
Guppies
Brake Fluid (don't laugh, a lady I know got that for Christmas one year from her spouse)
Velvet paintings
Any thing labeled (insert body part here)-BUSTER
Someone at the front door with a warrant
Household appliances

And yes, I'll offer advice to ladies on what to avoid for their husbands/partners

Soap on a Roap
Any Movie with Julia Roberts
Snuggies (cammo does NOT make it better)
A pedicure
A Coupon for a Target Portrait of him with your Mom and your Cat
Socks (he thought you said sex, now, no matter how warm they are, it's a let down)
Unsoliticed Instructions

But as far as commenting on a specific relationship, person or issue,  that one of my male colleagues/friends has, I'd just as soon not go there.  So when I hear the "I just don't understand women" as they look at me to enlighten them (like someone with a Ninja knife on their nightstand should be offering advice),  I simply send them this.

Yes, it's a stereotype, but it gets them to laugh, and they don't ask me for advice again.

 

The Difference Between Men and Women

Men  (two examples)

Women

Any questions?

You all have a great evening, I have a grill to go clean.
-Brigid