Tactical Fashion DOT com

I've written of my issues with "fashion" before.  I will never be pictured in one of those ladies glamour magazines except those old "do and don't" columns where they'd take photos of people off the street dressed improperly with a black square over their eyes to try and hide their identity - "Here's another woman that just does NOT know Ninja purses do NOT go with camo pants after Labor Day".

But then again, my closet looks something like this.

But one thing I will splurge on is a good haircut.  My hair is naturally curly, not tight curls, but still a lot of natural curl, very fine and lots of it.  On a good day, if I let it air dry,  and use a little styling product to make the curls stand out, it looks pretty good,  Other days, it looks like my head was attacked by a raccoon.  So for professional mode, I subdue the curl with a blow dryer and normally wear it up. 

Wanting something a little less boring , I decided to grow the bangs out.  That was fine until I ended up in the middle of something, dressed in gear that was supposed to keep my hair tucked away.  Except the bangs kept escaping.  Just long enough to cover my eyes.  Not long enough to stay under wraps.  I have to avoid the whole getting hands near my eyes things to brush them away (Mr. Rogers will explain biohazards, kids) and was growing increasing frustrated.  Finally I asked for a knife.

A simple knife will work on rope, boxes, crime scene tape, why not bangs.

I chopped several inches off of them.  I could see again.  End of problem.

Until I got home. They were surprisingly even, having done it without a mirror.  They were also VERY short.

I looked like a Romulan.

I went to the wonderful hair stylist that has dealt with my free range hair for years and she said "OMG. . . . .your bangs".  I grinned and said "don't worry, I told people you did it".

Fortunately my hair grows fast.  But there's a reason people don't come to me for fashion or accessory tips.

Or advice on what to buy from Victoria's Secret.

I wanted some pajamas.  Not the standard Victoria's Secret burn and pillage outfit, just regular warm, comfy pjs.  Victoria's Secret actually has them and they're made of material that's wonderfully soft and just gets softer with each wash. I know, as I got a pair of yellow ones as a gift and I wore them until they literally fell apart. 

So I found a pair, style wise. But no yellow. The solid colors were all on back order, so I took the only one in stock.  Polka Dot.  On the 6 foot, 100 pound model (35 pounds of which was hair and cleavage) they looked kind of cute.

Not so much in real life. (I don't remember them being that "dotty" in the catalog)

I'm not sure what came to mind first.

A target on a REALLY bad day of shooting .45

101 Dalmatians.

or Clowns.

Ladies are always told the right footwear makes an outfit, and men are said to like red shoes, but why can't I get THESE out of my head.

Hmmm, no.  Maybe something in a warm slipper.

But they are indeed warm and fuzzy, not a terrible way to spend a very stormy evening with ones favorite fuzzy friend (hey give me back my shoe!)