Tasting the Scotch in Scotland

On The Royal Mile

The magnificent Edinburgh Castle

Churches galore

Blowing the pipes.

Edinburgh, a fine old medieval town. Whining bagpipes, kilts, clans and Scotch whiskey.

Want to play the bagpipe?  Race around in a wool skirt?  Claim ancestry back to the Celts?  Mac this, Mc that?  I don’t want anyone checking my ancestry, or my credit rating.

On the other hand:  Want some smooth sipping aged malt whiskey?  Even the Judge is nodding. The defense rests.

Found just the place to sip some Scotch and learn trivia that’ll win you a bar bet or two. The Scotch Experience, a discrete four story building in downtown Edinburgh, in the middle of The Royal Mile.

“Honey, you go on ahead.  I’m just going to stop in here for a second.  Looks like a real educational opportunity.” 

That’s not a lie.  The Scotch Experience will fill you with more information than you can possibly digest before compete inebriation.

Step through the door, a lovely maiden sells you a ticket, and plops you in a rotating barrel. Just sit back and grab an insight into the three steps of making whiskey.

The Tasting selections, from smoky to sweet

Fermentation.  Ingredients are almost the same as beer.  Malt, water, yeast.  What is malt again?  Barley drenched in water, allowed to sprout, then dried and ground. Mixed with water and yeast, fermentation takes place.  To get a smoky flavor, they dry the barley with a peat fire.

Distillation.Separates the water from the fragrant alcohol, raising the alcohol content to about 70%.  See, if you hadn’t slept through Chem class…

Maturation.  Scotch Whiskey must be made in Scotland, using only barley, water, and yeast, and it must be matured no less than three years.  Most single malts are aged much longer.  The longer it matures, the less Scotch you have.  Evaporation takes about 2% a year.

Barrels of oak, first used for Bourbon or Sherry...then Scotch

How about ‘blended whiskies?’  Good question.  To create a blended whiskey, a master blender combines several Scotches, along with some so-called grain whiskey.  Grain whiskey comes from wheat, or other grains other than barley. 

Here’s a tip:  A blended whiskey carries the age of the youngest scotch used in the blend.

The age of the Scotch (time in the barrel) determines the flavor.  But aging is not linear.  I tasted The Dalmore 12 and 15 year old Scotches, then bought the 12 year old, finding it smoother and tastier.  Taste is individual, like the ideal temperature of bath water, or the size of the perfect breast.  With breasts, of course, opportunity trumps everything but getting caught.

Another tip:  Once a Scotch is bottled, the maturation process stops.  Cold.  A 10 year old bottle of Scotch forever remains a 10 year old bottle of Scotch, until it finally becomes an empty bottle of Scotch.

Geography.  There are five Scotch producing areas in Scotland:  Highlands, Lowlands, Islay (pronounced Eye-la), Speyside, and Campbeltown.

Tip:  Every minute, 2340 Bottles of Scotch are sold worldwide.  That’s about 20 bottles per second.

Here’s a quick tour of the four major areas, by flavor.

Lowlands:  Citrus, to an almost bread flavor.

Highlands:  Sweet, nutty florals.

Speyside:  Light to dark fruit, like Christmas

Islay:  smoky, sweet, possibly a light iodine finish

These are only hints. Expect dramatic variations and surprises.  In any case, the best place to begin your quest in the heart of Edinburgh, on The Royal Mile, at The Scotch Experience. 

The perfect glass for tasting.  Glencairn. Designed in 2006 and winner of The Queen's Award 

One wall of the 3400 bottle Scotch collectiion

Another wall of the collection

World's largest bottle of Scotch...five feet tall

But, there's more to Scotland than Scotch

“Honey, I’m fine.  Just a few more minutes.  Go ahead and finish the castle tour… visit the gift shop, go to the spa, get a massage, have your nails done.”

Up in the Highlands, Down by the Speyside, Over in Nippon

Three Favorites

Shhhhh…not a word to anyone.  I’m about to share the results of my blind tasting of three sinfully delicious, single malt whiskeys.  By blind tasting, I mean I tasted until I couldn’t see the bottles.  Fortunately, I took photos and shouted out random comments to those around me also in various stages of what I term ‘sobriety withdrawal.’  With the alacrity of a bug-eyed drooler, I managed to scratch out a few notes of my own.

One of the outstanding features of all three of these whiskeys is that they will not break the bank.  As any other former prowler of the late night dens in Madrid, Paris, or London knows, a whiskey affliction can be a deep pocket experience.  Not so with these.  But, I’m the first to admit, cost is one thing and taste is another.  All three of these are in a steady parade through my liquor cabinet.  Their excellence is valued not only by the tiniest tinkle of golden coins, but also by joyous salivation.  Now let’s deal with the details.

Briefly:  Old Pulteney 12 year old hails from the far north of Scotland; in fact if you went any further north, ye’d be in with the fishes in Pentland Firth. (About $32)  It is the northern most distillery in all of Scotland, and is in the Highlands.

Glen Grant, The Major’s Reserve (no age given) is a Speyside variety (About $20) Where is Speyside,? you might well ask. Hold up your left hand, palm facing away.  Now put your right thumb on the part of your left hand where the thumb joins the forefinger.  That’s about where Speyside is.   What?  Are you nuts?  Put your hand down!

Suntory’s Yamazaki 12 year old (about $40) comes from the mountains near Kyoto, where three pristine rivers converge. Yamazaki roughly translates as Mountain Whiskey.  Only distilled since 1923, Yamazaki’s 12 year old has nevertheless won medals across the globe.  The 18 year old is supposed to be even smoother, but lacking the will to go into debt, I haven’t sampled it.

How many distilleries does Scotland have?  About a hundred active distilleries, but some of those are grain distilleries.  Which district is the largest in area?  The Highlands.  Which district has the most distilleries?  Speyside.  The name means by the River Spey.  Another fascinating fact about Scotch whiskey is that it tastes really, really good.  Ok, now that I’ve prepped you for bar bets, let’s talk about taste.

All three of these single malts are distinct in color and flavor.  Glen Grant, The Major’s Reserve is a bit milder, and with its light golden tint, it carries an almost fruity foundation, perhaps because it comes from further inland.  You roll it on your tongue and dream of sun-drenched afternoons, tempered with a gentle breeze.  Old Pulteney is quite different.  The distillery is right on the coast, near the town of Wick.  It may be because of the location that Pulteney brings to mind heavy sea air wrapped in a blanket of fog.  It’s a darker hue of gold. Sometimes called ‘the ship’s whiskey,’ it does indeed have a bare hint of salt on the finish.  Overall, there’s fullness that floats over the tongue, without a touch of sweetness.  This is a bolder whiskey than The Major’s Reserve.  Definitely an after dinner reward for having declined that extra potato and brandied torte with strawberry cream.  The third whiskey, Yamazaki’s 12 year old, is more robust than the other two, and carries a deeper, richer color and flavor.  In fact, as much as I like all three, (and will continue to spend my wife’s money on them), Yamazaki is a cut above.  The fullness of flavor rides softly on the palate, without any harsh edges.  Perhaps that’s why I tuck it away and hide it from all but a favored few.  By favored few, I of course mean you and that absolutely gorgeous woman you’re with.